Releasing That Which Does Not Serve You

I’m going to talk about something very personal today, which I think may help some of you in a similar situation. My youngest daughter and I were at one time extremely close. She had experiences as a teen that only I tried to understand. I didn’t judge her, I just listened, and I think that was the best thing for her at that time in her life.

As things went on, I divorced my children’s father, and eventually found a new person to travel life with. She, as well, grew up, and found her partner. She has been married for four years and has two children. About the time she met her partner, things just started getting different between us. It was as if we realized we didn’t fit in the same position we once did for each other. We slowly became estranged. Things got very strained, and weird, and I don’t think either of us really knew why.

I spent about 5 years trying to understand why she seemingly hated me. While this is probably untrue, that is how we talk to ourselves sometimes. I moved away for 2 years, which made the situation worse. I purposefully flew back home to visit her family at least every 3-4 months, because I wanted to see my grandson (as well as her) so badly. I meditated, and prayed over this situation relentlessly.

Finally, just before she gave birth to my second grandchild, I just couldn’t take it anymore. It felt like I was tied to the whipping tree, and every time I reached out to her, she hurt me more. What to do? I gave up, and then saw an ad on Instagram by a psychic healer that I followed. She was interesting, and put forth pretty rational thinking, so I made an appointment to speak to her.

Immediately upon speaking, she could sense my pain. I gave up no information, however, once pressed on why I was so sad and frustrated, I explained the situation. She said she felt my daughter and I were connected so strongly – so tightly to one another, that neither of us could breathe. She went on to see that we were connected by our root chakras. This is the base chakra at the bottom of our spines. The root chakra connects us to the Earth, and builds the foundation for the rest of our energetic being, however, I don’t believe it is meant to be shared with another person.

After speaking for about 40 minutes, she gave me the best advice I ever received: cut the cord. If I could just CUT THE CORD energetically, through my psychic self, we could both heal and I would finally be free of the pain. We had to distance ourselves from each other in order to grow.

Long story short, it worked. I started working on healing myself. I began giving myself some love and space and stopped beating myself up over it. I immediately, and I do mean IMMEDIATELY, began to feel a great weight lifting off of my shoulders.

We are doing much better today. I see her as much as I can, and love to spend time with my grandchildren. We had it out with each other, and I was surprised to find that it bothered her almost more than it bothered me. We are two peas in a pod. The bottom line is, that relationships can be difficult. We aren’t here to breeze through our lives with no conflict; that’s not what helps us learn.

I kept hearing through years and years of yoga practice, “release the things that no longer serve you.” This was a prime example. I needed to release guilt, fear, frustration, and imaginary scenes of what I thought our relationship should look like. Release the stuff that just makes you crazy. Let it go, and somehow it will right itself. Great advice that I could have listened to earlier finally materialized in my stubborn self.

If you do self care first, you will have enough care to give to others. Stay well, Cheers, Deb

Psychic meetup fun

Have you connected with your spirit guides? Last night I went to my first meetup group for connection with my spirit guides. I know you may not know what this is, or believe it is possible to connect to your guides, so let me explain.

First: spirit guides are a psychic manifestation of our higher selves. Through these “guides” (which may present to you differently than to other people), you will connect with higher purpose and receive information and intuition that can guide you down correct paths in your life.

This is assuming that your higher self is connected with divine consciousness (which I personally believe is true), and your higher purpose wants to instruct you on how to live a fulfilling life, while learning life lessons to bring you closer to your higher self! Whew!

This whole thing is going to produce a TON of questions, including: “Why can’t I already know this stuff?, Why do I need to know this? Why are we living in a physical body, then?….and on…and on… and on…”

This, my friends is called “starting on your spiritual journey”, which many people on the planet never walk on, ever, (you can tell this easily), and getting yourself involved in a seemingly endless quest for answers to life itself. It can become all-consuming and quite convoluted if you let it.

This does not negate the quest itself. I feel that “an unexamined life is not worth living”, as supposedly stated by Socrates. As a human, I feel it is very important to try and figure out what the heck I’m supposed to accomplish here, and I’m pretty aware that it’s not money in the bank, a big house, or a diamond collection. That being said, I have been “awakened” to this quest for about 15 years (consciously, anyway).

Back to the original spirit guide meetup group. This consisted of 1 leader, who has learned to connect with her guides, who connect with your guides, who inform you about stuff, and 4 participants. I already have “connected” with my guides through other means, but wanted to see what was up.

We all have 4 primary ways we receive intuitive information, and our guides will chose which of the 4 ways to best commune with you. It helps to know how you operate in order to work on and strengthen the primary tool they will use.

  • Clairvoyance: you can “see” mental pictures that inform you
  • Clairaudience: you can “hear” them telling you info (do not confuse with your own voice….hard one)
  • Knowing: you instinctively “feel” this intuition in your gut
  • Feeling: you feel everything, even taking in other people’s junk. Yuck!

For my part, everything was as expected. My primary connection is clairvoyance, and secondary is clairaudience. It’s true that I “see” things in my mind’s eye that look kind of like the negative to a photograph. I can also ask for more information on these pictures, and will be told who the person is, or what the symbol means, etc.

I have to say that being with a group of consciously aware people in a small room will make you feel really great! It was also fun listening to everyone’s spiritual journeys and how they related to the information given. Our next big class will be on January 2, where we will receive our guides “intentions” for us for the upcoming year. I can’t wait to hear what this is!

So, if you are inclined to walk on your spiritual path, and are lucky enough to have groups of like-minded people in your town, I highly recommend that you take the time to participate. If you don’t, just spend more time with yourself in meditation, because no one else is going to be able to do this work for you, and it is ultimately healing.

Have a wonderful weekend, and take care. Life is for living! Cheers, Deb

Start small, then build

I recently spent 13 hours in the car by myself traveling from my home in Colorado back to my childhood home in the Midwest near the Mississippi River. Several hours spent in the car by yourself can lend itself to many introspections, much of which are trivial and fleeting. It takes a bit of practice, but you can eventually concentrate on some chosen topic in your mind that might need attention and try to solve a problem, or analyze a situation, job, or relationship. Time spent alone doesn’t have to be boring, it can be very productive.

Having free time is like this also. We can do absolutely nothing – including thinking, or, we can really delve into our subconscious and “figure out” stuff. Most of the time we don’t have the time, or mindfulness, to really think about stuff. Or, the stuff we really NEED to think about is brushed back into the subconscious to gather more dust. Unfortunately, not addressing the stuff in the subconscious can come back to bite us in the butt later on. Out of the blue, your boyfriend asks you what you made of that last encounter with his sister, or your best friend asks you if you finally planned out that girlfriends weekend (and you didn’t). It could be superficial stuff like that, but it could be much more.

Starting to pull things out of your brain to think about, can be a little like a “to do” list. Think of yourself as a big vase. Over time, your vase starts to fill up with water, or thoughts. The water gets to the top of the vase and starts to overflow. Suddenly, you feel “full”, or unable to digest even the smallest addition of information that comes your way. Clearing out, or emptying out the vase, is critical to being open and available to take in new information. I think of the vase as being clogged by junk. Once I can enter some kind of meditative state and clear out the junk, my life becomes more full. It’s a paradox. You can’t take in good stuff if your full of bad stuff, simply put. Meditative state comes in many forms for many people. Some find it knitting, or rock climbing, or staring at clouds. Sometimes it’s just time sitting on the front porch at night and shutting out the rest of the world. Meditation is pretty much just sitting comfortably with yourself.

As a child, I was terrified of other people. Talk about shy…..I had it bad. I hid behind my mother’s leg when the meter man, or insurance man came over. I rarely talked to other people, and never to strangers. Over the years I made it through school, acquired a few close friends, and then went on to nursing school. At this point I was forced to speak to strangers all the time. I met new patients every day, and they were sick or lonely, or both. Through my training and subsequent career, I learned to open up and now can speak to almost anyone about almost anything. I may be the nurse that speaks to you before you enter the operating room. I am your ally, and must gain your trust in a few short minutes. I have the skill to do that now, which I never thought I would.

This is an example of starting with a small thing, like stepping out from behind your mother’s pant leg, and building slowly into standing in front of a terrified person and becoming a friend. Life is a progression of lessons and hopefully, we are building a strong foundation to an elaborate “house”, which we live in as accomplished adults. That’s the basic idea, anyway. Thinking about things in our heads in order to clear our subconscious, thereby enabling ourselves to bring more goodness into our lives is essential to the building process. So, the next time you have a long car ride in front of you, and you get tired of listening to the radio and podcasts, sit back, relax, and take in the goodness of a long, slow thinking session. Talk to yourself out loud if you have to in order to figure stuff out. Cross those ideas off your subconscious list and feel the weight come off your shoulders. You don’t have to hold onto stuff forever. Take it out, cross it off, and collect new goodness….you deserve that.

Enjoy the day, and follow me for more musings,

Cheers, Deb

Riding on the machine. Happy blond woman rides in the car. Vector illustration in cartoon style